They's gonna be race wars, and countries is gonna fight one another. They's gonna be earthquakes all over the place and folks goin' hungry. This here is how the birth pains start. -Mark 13:9
It's the end of the world as we know it. -R.E.M
Things is gittin' crazy. Last night I saw where they done erected a statue of ole Slewfoot and commenced to worshippin' it. Right here in the good ole US of A! What in TARNATION!!!!??? This is all gettin' stranger than Trump's hair. Dawgs and cats livin' together...TOTAL CHAOS! I been studyin' Bible Prophecy fer 20 years I think we're here y'all....that last days.
But you know, the end of the kindly gits a bad wrap, y'all. It ain't really the end. It's the beginnin'. It's the end a this world....and look here, fer some folks it cain't end quick enough. Some folks, a lotta folk, ain't had nuthin' but pain in this ole world and then they come out with three really bad Star Wars sequels and it just made life that much more hellicious...so some folks is ready fer the end!
But that's the point. It ain't really the end of the world. It's the end of the age. And let me tell ya, sumpin' great is a comin'. King Jesus is a comin' and bringin' with him the coolest world since Xander in Guardians of the Galaxy, but much cooler. I don't want y'all to miss it.
How do I git there, ya ask? Well, just put yer faith and yer trust in King Jesus. Admit yer a sinner accordin' to the Good Book(that's hard I know) and ask him to come into yer heart and fergive ye. I know some of y'all are thinkin'....AND BECOME ONE A THEM DANG CHRISTIANS!!! NEVER! I know, I know. I did'n like 'em much either before I become one. But I started to like King Jesus when I found out about him.
Here's this dude that loves me no matter what I done done. And he's gonna be with me ferever and he'll live in my heart and help me through this ole crummy life and then I git to go to heaven to boot? I liked him...so I just up and become one them there Christians one day. I admitted I was a sinner and all that. And you know what, King Jesus was even better than they said. And he ain't never left me. He's fergiven me fer all manner of dumbnuttery even after I become a Christian...and He's been with me through the hard times...even the Star Wars sequels.
Stevie Rey is a writer, humorist, and Rockstar Wannabe. The Author of The Hillbilly Bible Series.
